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The Friendship Rule Hurting Gen Z

The Friendship Rule Hurting Gen Z

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April 27, 2026

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The Friendship Rule Hurting Gen Z
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The Friendship Rule Hurting Gen Z

Grief coach and author Jarie Bolander argues that younger men are becoming less comfortable expressing affection to their friends, and that this may be contributing to loneliness in men.

The article focuses on a 2026 survey by Ipsos and King's College London:

31% of Generation Z men agreed that men should not say ‘I love you’ to their friends.
Only 20% of Baby Boomers men agreed.

This is surprising because people often assume younger generations are more emotionally open - but in this area, Gen Z men appear more emotionally restrictive than older men.

Bolander believes this reflects a larger cultural problem: men today are taught that they should be stoic, independent, and not express vulnerability. Saying “I love you” to a male friend may therefore feel awkward, weak, or “unmanly,” even when the feeling is real.

The author argues that this emotional silence has consequences: when men cannot openly express care or affection, their friendships become less close. Men become more isolated and lonely.

The author says the problem is not that men do not feel love for their friends. Instead, they often lack permission to express it.

He gives the example of She Is Not Your Rehab, which created “Love U Bro Day.” On that day, men are encouraged to tell their friends “love you, bro.” The campaign became popular because many men actually wanted to say those words once they were given social permission.

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