why do humans fight wars?

You’re waiting in line at the store, and someone suddenly slips ahead without saying a word. Maybe you think to yourself, “What a bad person!”

Or maybe you text a friend who promised to meet you, and they don’t reply for hours. You start thinking, “They don’t care about me.”

It’s so natural to look at these moments and decide something about the person’s character—that they’re just careless, selfish, or disrespectful.

But what if you’re only seeing part of the story?

Psychologists call this mistake the fundamental attribution error. It’s when someone does something wrong, and we think it’s because of who they are—and not because of what their circumstances are.

For example, say a co-worker misses a deadline. You might think, “They’re lazy” or “They don’t care.” But if you miss a deadline, you’re more likely to say, “I had a lot going on” or “Something unexpected came up.” We cut ourselves some slack, but not others.

It’s because we know what is happening in our lives.

We don’t know what’s happening in others’ lives.  

This little habit of judging others too quickly can cause misunderstandings and hurt feelings. It makes us see people unfairly and can even damage relationships.

It’s also part of why people fight, and why countries go to war.

See, at the end of the day, we’re all human. Most of us want the same things—safety, respect, a little bit of peace.

But when we start seeing others as bad people instead of people like us who might be struggling…that’s when things get dangerous. We stop seeing them as human. And when that happens, it starts to feel justified to fight them, hurt them, or bring them down.

We start to believe they are a problem, they are evil, or they can’t be trusted. We stop trying to understand. We stop asking why they’re doing it. We start turning other humans into enemies.

Islam encourages us to be careful with our judgments. The Prophet SAW said:

Meanwhile, the Quran reminds us to be forgiving and give people the benefit of the doubt:

What if we all tried this the next time someone annoyed us? Instead of thinking the worst, we pause and ask: Could they be struggling with something I don’t see? Could there be a reason I’m missing?

Wouldn’t the world be a better place?